SAAN DIAH GO

a truth i’ve been unhappy about learning to accept lately: you don’t get to choose when your life will change forever. i suppose the actions following the catalyst are formed from our free will, but the tragedy that’s the beginning is never premeditated.

i am capable of adapting and changing, but i don’t enjoy it. i don’t like change. COVID-19 is currently the worst its ever been in California. nothing has been normal for a year now.

san diego has been a place of normalcy for me for the past ten years. some of my best adventures started there. i find consistency.

a couple snapshots from october.

also just an fyi, it costs roughly $15.00 to develop disposable cameras nowdays. yeah i was mad too. i developed six.

hi riley

sami bb

it was a pleasure as always, ma’am. can’t wait to see ur pretty face and hang again. Her (my) board is one of Riley Hawk’s designs from his Baker line.

Independent trucks. Bones wheels. Mob grip tape. Spitfire bearings. The good stuff.

i was taught by a pretty cool dude.

we didn’t even want them to sign our shirts lol.

loved your music back in 05 but we just wanted the free tee shirt.

quick, irrelevant, fun facts about my experiences with Senes Fail. i have a scar above my right eye lid because was busted open during their set. So lame, right? when i woke up i remember thinking i was just sweating a lot or something because i felt fine. nah.. lol. anyway the point i’m getting to is that the two friends i’d gone with got to meet thee entire band while they waited outside the medic room or whatever. you’re welcome nathan and katie.

second pointless thing i’ve realized is how much sense (haha) it makes that Buddy is gay. i honestly hadn’t listened to their music sine junior high/high school-ish. but my point is that almost every single song on their Let It Enfold You record is about how much he fucking hates women with a passion. anyway. seeing them at Warped was a cool nostalgia thing.

mr.j

today is a weird day. it’s bad, but doesn’t have to be depending on your mindset.

if anything, josh is the luckiest one of us right now. he doesn’t have to suffer through this heat wave, doesn’t have to listen to our rapist president, and his friends bring him free weed and old fashions on a regular basis. (i guess we all had to pay you back for the copious amounts of free alcohol somehow)

oh, and he gets to rest for as long as he wants and i’m very jealous of that fact considering i feel exhausted the majority of the time.

all jokes aside, i miss my friend. i miss getting excited with you during “croptober”. i miss the way you’d respectfully leave your house so that i could photograph your naked wife in peace. i miss your damn Subi that you loved ALMOST more than Monique.

but… i think what i will always miss the most is the type of love you and Mo had for each other. you worshipped her, and her sun rose and set for you. you two.. i don’t know. you guys just worked.

this day has absolutely nothing to do with me, so i feel extremely selfish for crying but we fucking miss you, dude. we miss your stupid peacock hair head bobbing when you got passionate during a conversation. i miss how much we both loved your wife’s ass, lol. you had good energy. most of the time your aura was just warm and bright which is a good thing because that means you’re basically zen.

None of us are mad at you. this wasn’t your fault. we just fucking miss you. you’ve made your presence known to me a few times since you were lucky enough to get closer to God, but its so bitter sweet. i’m happy you’re okay. i hope you and my dad blaze it up once in awhile up in heaven. i’m taking your wifey out to see ya later today. i even bought your favorite swishers that i lowkey hate, lol.

happy anniversary to both of you. i have nothing but mad love for both of you.

PS. you’d be so damn proud of your wife. she is truly one of the strongest humans i’ve ever met.

Goddess

this mini rant isn’t important, but i’m going to complain anyway. i shot this milf over a month ago, but i was too depressed due to a broken heart to go through them/edit them.

Welp. Thankfully, my support team of badass babes have been helping me come back to life, so please enjoy this gorgeous woman.

u promised the world and i fell for it. i put u first and u adored it. u set fires to my forests and u let it burn. u sang off key in my chorus.. cause it wasn’t urs.

welcome 2 new york, its been waiting 4 u.

In honor of my dad’s.. death day? Celebration of life? Flame on day? (it’s a Fantastic Four reference) I don’t fucking know. Regardless, I wanted to write about one of the best and worst memories of my life. It happened after he died, but I wanted to do it for him because he used to believe in me that much.

Five years ago now, my best friend went with me to Brooklyn so that I could photograph a friend of mine from college; along with his bazillion bothers because they’d just released a documentary that was doing really well. It was up for an MTV movie award and everything. ( Is that still cool? )

Being a fellow artist that wasn’t born into a rich family or had a famous daddy, he understood why I wanted to fly out there to photograph him and his brothers while they had premiers at different venues in hopes it’d help my non existent photography career. Strictly business. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way that when you’re trying to photograph a wolfpack of six brothers and three out of the six hate the limelight, its basically impossible to get them all together unless they’re getting paid. Not to mention the guy I’d been dating dumped me the second I got off the plane, so I only mustarded up the balls to one premier. Which is kind of a bummer because that’s like some childhood dream shit, ya know?

Thankfully the universe was on my side the night I did go (ironically we were late) because it became my first legit magazine publication. Thank you, BUST Magazine.

And thank you Lindsay for wake up before sunrise to walk the Brooklyn bridge with me.

xoxo gossip girl ❤

Model: @lindsay_rochelle